Ghosting what is it, and why shouldn’t you do it?

Yep, totally get it, planning a wedding is extremely time consuming and often rather stressful. I want to do whatever I can to help make your life easier. And hopefully also provide you with my services to deliver you your dream wedding.

I also understand that I may not always be the supplier for you for various reasons. Be that price, style, techniques, personalities or otherwise. What I do ask though is that you don’t ghost me or other suppliers wherever possible.

What is ghosting?

Ghosting has several forms but at its simplest a supplier like me receives a really exciting enquiry from a fabulous couple. I reply back full of enthusiasm, answering any questions asked and adding a bit more information (often about pricing), and then…..

Crickets, silence, tumbleweed, nothing. Even after a potential follow up a week later, zilch, nadda, nothing.

Why does ghosting happen?

There are multiple reasons.
⁃ Research. Sending out multiple enquiries to multiple suppliers is very common. Yes if you’re going to contact 10 photographers, 10 venues, and 10 make up artists that’s an awful lot of people to reply to when you will only end up booking 3 of them.

⁃ Lack of Information. I try to answer as many potential questions as possible on my website but will always miss something. And I know a lot of suppliers have very limited information available online. I remember from my time as a bride, the frustration of basic information not being at my fingertips. There is nothing worse than finding your perfect supplier and then finding out they cost your entire wedding budget outright. If that is the case, don’t be afraid to (politely) say that.

⁃ Lack of time – when short of time and a supplier isn’t the right fit, not replying saves time. This time can add up especially if bulk contacting suppliers.

What benefits are there for couples not to ghost?

Yes I take it on the chin, I understand on this occasion I wasn’t the supplier for you. But I would have loved it, if on receiving my email or voicemail, you had taken 30 seconds to reply. I don’t expect an essay but a ‘thanks but you’re not going to be for us because of XYZ’ would be hugely appreciated. Although obviously disappointed not to be able to progress things further, I do love to get feedback as to why.

I can actually often do something to help remedy the situation as well, especially if you really are my perfect couple. There might be some flexibility on pricing I can offer. Or an alternative option that comes within your budget. I may be able to personally recommend another supplier who ticks the boxes I don’t. If I can’t remedy the situation for you, say for example a lack of information on my website, I might be able to for future couples.

Lastly suppliers are humans!

I may be a professional business owner but I am also human. I take ghosting on the chin, but however hard I am it still chips away.  Speaking with couples in person and explaining ghosting they are often horrified that they have indeed done it. They just didn’t realise that they were talking to a self employed business owner. The owner who handles every couple personally from enquiry through to delivery.

So please if you can take just a few seconds out of your day and drop me a quick note if you decide to go in another direction I would be eternally grateful.